1. Bring your guitar to school everyday and initiate mass sing-a-long sessions in the canteen. (make sure the songs are not played by MATS or BENGS underneath the void decks)
2. If you hate you GP tutor, choose one of the following options to avoid listening to her monotonous droning voice:
a. The Sarah
i. Raise your hand to be excused to the toilet
ii. Enter toilet cubicle and lock the door
iii. Put down the seat cover
iv. Proceed to take your daily afternoon NAP
v. Return to class 5 minutes before the end of GP lesson looking revitalized and sparkling
b. The Charlotte
i. Keep a VERY VERY VERY long fringe
ii. Let you fringe down during GP (or other lessons you hate)
iii. Use as a protective coverage to avoid detection from your tutor that you are actually asleep
c. The Joseph
i. Find a strategic seat at the back of the class
ii. Listen to your tutor for a nice lullaby
iii. Lean your head backwards, open your mouth
iv. SLEEP
d. The Sham (recommended for uncreative people who cannot be bothered with TRYING to look awake)
i. Put head on table
ii. Sprawl arms on table
iii. Continue to remain in comatose state until lesson is over
e. The Rox and Grace
i. Proceed to have a party in the Sick Bay
f. The Zahrah
i. “Where is Zahrah?” GP tutor asked?
ii. Class goes silent
3. When in doubt of where omnipresent weird humming noise is coming from, get Miss Sarina to say to Joseph “Eh Joseph, shut up!” Noise ceases.
4. On BE YOURSELF DAY, dress up as Siamese (conjoined) twins wearing Batman costumes and walk around the whole day with great difficulty, banging into things and people.
5. In Maths lessons, think of flying unicorns and rainbows. Then realize in JC2 that you didn’t know the existence of 100000000 topics went through last year.
6. When asked to take on the role of a nationalist during History lesson, create a country called Magicarp where people are divided not into races but their favourite ice-cream flavour.
7. When in doubt, even if you are a teacher, ask the class genius, also known as Ezra Ho for further clarification.
8. Use a big pencil case for everyday use – not just as a public stationery shop, but also to hide food items to sneak into the library.
9. When confronted by the evil librarian about the packets of food next to your jacket on the table, deny all allegations and insist those do not belong to you.
10. After the graduation party your school hosted, steal the entire tumbler full of drink and bring it up to your class while being chased by the crew of school councillors.
